Hi friends.

I had planned to continue showing our baby faves at all the normal milestone intervals – 6m, 9m, 1 yr, 18 months and so on. But then Clara started walking and really, as long as the girl was fed, rested and clothed – all she needed was a little mischief to keep her gears going. Screw the adorable wooden toys, sweet linen onesies and pristine soft leather crib shoes. She was ready for toddlerhood in every way.

Favorites have included scissors, phone cords, wallets, mommy’s pill bottles, sharpies and any other item we say no to. Preferred activities are picking at the mole on my clavicle (I had to have it removed), writing on the walls, the floor, herself and dipping her hands into the fish tank and then licking them.

This all might sound like complaining and truthfully it is and it isn’t. Obviously I don’t treasure following her around with a dust buster and magic eraser. Or clinging to her torso as she noodles out of my arms because I would not let her pick all of the flowers from our neighbors yard. But do I love the look of sheer delight on her face when I ask her if she wants to feed the fish in the morning? Yes. Do I laugh hysterically when she “finds” me “hiding” under the blanket? YAS. Do I share in her exaltation at Dave and Ava, her Hello Kitty plushes and opening the freezer? YES I DO!

It is equal parts joy and frustration. Energy and total exhaustion. I feel like such a dad when I say “this girl is going to keep us on our toes” but really, she is.

Take, for example the lovely spaghetti dinner we were having the other night when she somehow obtained a tiny circular smiley faced sticker, brought it to her sniffer and forcefully inhaled. One hour later David and I were on our way to Randall Children’s Hospital at the behest of our pediatrician. SO yeah, we’re on our toes now. Especially when it comes to stickers. And for anyone who is curious, we did not find the GD sticker up her nose.

She relishes at the sight of any kind of marker, ballpoint pen or other coloring apparatus. And after several walls scribbled in crayon and legs marked with pen, I got the girl an aqua doodle water mat on Amazon. Both her and her older sister love it and it was $12. It is this one if you are interested.

She is also a huge fan of the out-of-doors, despite my disapproval ;). Luckily though, she prefers walks to hikes and patios to grass.

Since parks these days are abysmal ghost towns that remind us the golden days of yesteryear, we have mostly steered clear. We did stop at one a couple of weeks ago and couldn’t resist an illegal session on the swing set.

But like come onnnn. Look at that face! ARREST US.

Can we also quickly touch on how insurmountably hard it is to raise children, one being a toddler, amidst a pandemic? While working from home full time? While trying to maintain relationships, friendships, connections? While trying to keep a tidy home? A sane mind?

Like I said…insurmountable.

We do not have childcare. So when I say it is a balancing act, it really is. I feel guilty when I have not stepped away from my computer for 4 hours and Clara has not been properly interacted with for more than 5 minutes. But then I feel guilty when I step away for 20 minutes to chase her around the kitchen or read her a book and I realize I’ve missed an urgent message from a co-worker. It’s a lose-lose. I know I am not alone and like HSM reminds us, “we’re all in this together!” but like, damnnn. This is hard.

But here are the things that make it better:

And

oh, and

did I mention?

and these guys too

So I guess the baby update is that she really is not a baby anymore. And while that makes me so sad I could vom, I am also pretty excited and proud at the little gal she is becoming. Stay tuned for her 2 year update in which I will  spend 48 solid hours in tears.